Never alone
by JensenAckles13
Summary: Sam Winchester is alone with his thoughts. Dean is coming back, right? He begins to wonder why he even questioned himself, or why he even questioned his brother, for that matter.


**Never alone**

He hadn't really thought about how much he needed his brother. He had never really thought about how much Dean did for him, or how much Dean sacrificed for him. He'd just never taken the time to think about it, but now, sitting here waiting for Dean to come back after hearing about Jim's older brother, after hearing about how horrible he really was, he got his chance to think. Jim's brother had left him there to die; left him trapped in that stupid twenty foot high ditch, and hadn't come back for him, like he had promised. Dean had promised and yes, he would return-that he was sure of, but should he honestly be that sure of it? Dean's done a lot of shit for him, even gone to Hell and back, literally, but did that mean Dean really wanted to do all of that, or was it just because of that stupid promise he made to dad? The rain pelted down on him even harder than before. Already his clothes were soaked. He just prayed to God that Dean would get back soon. Jim had left long ago, his ghost quickly disappearing when the rain and thunder came, so now he was alone to his thoughts. Did he really deserve Dean? Did Dean truly want him as a brother? Did Dean truly want to be related? Did Dean want him as his family?

"_**I'm only gonna say this once; you make a move on him you'll be dead before you hit the ground, you understand me? Do I make myself clear?!"**_All the things Dean had said, did he really mean? Of course he did. How could he yell them with that much emotion, whisper them with that much truth in those eyes? Was Dean even _capable _of lying to him about something like that? His brother had been protecting him for god knows how long. Dean had been watching over him like a Hawk ever since he had carried Sam out of that burning building. It was true, and anyone who knew them knew that was true. Hell, anyone who didn't know them knew that was true. How could they not? Dean was….something else entirely. He never failed to surprise Sam…good and bad. Was that a good thing? Probably not. Did Sam love it about his brother? Hell yes. Did he ever want him to change? No, he would never want Dean to change. He couldn't imagine Dean _not _being Dean, his sarcastic, over protective big brother. He just hoped that Dean could see that. He just hoped that he had given Dean enough of an insight on what he was feeling, but he knew he hadn't. That was going to change. How much had Dean done that Sam didn't know about? It took a few weeks before Sam finally found out about the deal. What else had Dean done to protect him? What lengths had he gone to that Sam didn't know about to keep him safe? It was still a mystery to him. Dean didn't tell him everything he had done, and that was probably to keep him safe but if Dean was keeping secrets like that, he wasn't entirely sure he wanted to know.

"_**As long as I'm around, nothin' bad is gonna happen to you,"**_Was that true? It was easy to believe. It was said with so much truth and compassion it was nearly impossible not to believe. Why he was even sitting here doubting his brothers protective instinct he really didn't know. Dean had never failed to come through to him, not once. Even when Sam had been evil, about to kill Jo, and had begged Dean to shoot him, Dean didn't. It was that over protective thing. He wasn't sure whether he was glad his brother had it or not. It got him into some crazy situations that he didn't want him or his brother in, but it also saved lives; saved his, countless times. It was impossible to say a big enough thank you for that. Then again, he knew Dean realized that. He knew Dean knew he loved him, but did he really know? Had Sam not put in enough effort to let him realize that? He sure hoped he had; he had tried a helluva lot harder than he thought he could. But Dean was different; he didn't take the hint, you'd have to tell him straight forward and Sam couldn't remember the last time he had straight out said he loved his brother. Sure, he couldn't remember the last time Dean had to him but he was the older brother, he didn't have to, it was a given. Sam could tell just in the acts and stunts his brother pulled that Dean loved him to.

"Sam!" He heard a yell from above him and a smile tugged up the corners of his lips. Yeah, Dean did love him and he loved his brother. He knew his brother knew he loved him too; otherwise his brother wouldn't have come back. He knew that for sure; he knew that he loved his brother and his brother loved him. He did take him for granted, sure, but they couldn't both give the same things. They couldn't both sacrifice the same things. They were two different people; all they had to do was put in the same amount of effort; the same amount of love and trust and it was a given to know.

"_**We're brothers, family, and no matter how bad it gets, that will never change." **_

If he could describe his brother in five words, what would they be?

Loyal

Over-protective

Loving

Strong

Fighter

If he could only describe his brother in one?

_**Hero**_


End file.
